Balance

Somewhere in the back of my mind, is this constant nagging voice, pack up and go. Go mountain biking somewhere new, go skiing somewhere new, find a new place to hike, sleep, walk the dog, camp... Adventure. This voice tells me to adventure. I used to suppress this voice in my head, fear of the unknown, a constant need to over plan everything, being doubted by others, and trying to meet society's standards of being "normal." Except I don't want to be normal, I want to be me.

Me is wild and free, an adventuresome spirit who also works really hard to get shit done to make these adventures happen. There is a time to work and a time to play. Sometimes play can be work and work can be play, but sometimes I like having some separation. I dream of living out of a 4x4 Sprinter van or a pickup truck that can also tow a small RV/ camper home. I want my dog to come with me on my adventures. 

Anyone who knows me knows that smile, light in the eyes and laugh, the look when I am genuinely excited about something. I used to hate my smile (braces and the nightmare before them) but now I realize that when I see photos of myself my smile and eyes all lit up tell a story and to me that is the story of finding balance and with that comes happiness. 

I used to over think everything, over plan, and want a step-by step- guide for everything and then slowly over time. Bumps in the road happened and I began to let go. There is a balance between planning and going with the flow. That balance looks different for everyone, for me I work really hard and adventure when I can.  Wild, short, quick and sometimes crazy sounding weekend plans are my specialty. Near or far, sometimes backyard adventures are the best adventures, with something new thrown into the mix every once in a while. I just got back from a fast trip to Taos, New Mexico- I got to go to a new state, ski a new resort and see my best friend. I left at 1 am Friday morning and I was back home at 8pm Saturday night to ski tune, and it's a 6 hour drive. You just have to get up, get out and go on adventures, no excuses. 

Having a flexible plan where you can plan some things and then follow that voice in your head saying "let's do it!" When you listen to that voice and trust that you know where you are going and what you are doing things fall into place and begin to work out magically and you forget that fact that you might not have had a plan but being flexible and going with the flow has brought you to a much better place. 

As humans we will fail, follow the wrong path, and make mistakes but you can only be so hard on yourself. Trust your gut. We are never 100% sure of anything and if we live within a safe bubble all of the time then we don't take risks. Risks put us out there vulnerable to the world doing something that scares us and when you look back on those experiences they seem less scary and we realize we have found a balance.