Balance

There’s a side to me that needs it to stay focused on work. During the winter months I become more of a homebody and trying to maintain a ritual is a top priority. Black Tea is the key ingredient, to my success. Every morning I wake up, sit with my cup of tea and relax. Some days I write and others I just get ready for work. I try to take the time every morning to relax, I am tired of feeling stressed out and anxious with the leftover shit from the day before. I don’t want to be weighed down by this and trying to create a routine is one method in which I am trying to break this habit. Life throws you lots of punches that somedays I don’t know how to relax but we are all learning to find this balance, because there is no perfect formula.

Everyone I meet in life has a story to tell and something for me to learn from, no matter their age or background. It takes a lot of hard work and patience before things ever seem to begin to work out. There is no skimping or minimal work; hard work and dedication are what get you places. I try to always do what I love and live in the moment all while working my ass off. 

When I start to think about other lifestyles I can’t seem to sit still. I am currently going through one of my work-a-holic phases and I have goals for the end of the tunnel and I hope everyday that they will work out. I have moments where I wonder should I give back into stability of a Monday-Friday job, knowing that it’s OK, to take a day off and not fear loosing a days worth of pay and a sick day if needed is actually paid! But in the end I suck it up, don’t take sick or personal days and just keep working. Working for the future dream. Right now, that’s wanting to trade in my Subaru for a Pickup Truck. I want a pickup, to create a livable space in the bed with a cap and have a place for my dog Kit to be when traveling, other than “inside a car.” Along with actually having ground clearance to reach some great hiking and biking destinations.

I must admit, finding and maintaining balance is hard. Especially when working 50-60 hours a week between 2 jobs on top of graduate school. But somehow I make it work, it’s not always pretty, I am not always social but it’s my balance where I can see the future and future events and plans that this is necessary now, and I just have to remind myself of that everyday.